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I'm absolutely fed up with these clueless call centre chaps from India who presume we're all dimwitted. He rang, claiming my computer was on the fritz, so I thought I'd have a bit of fun with him! I asked how he could possibly know, and he chirped that he was there to assist with my dilemma. I told him I was on the verge of launching my PC out the window due to a multitude of issues. The man told me to head over to my computer, and I replied it would take a while as I'm rather elderly and have to ascend a rather steep staircase. After a bit, I informed him I was finally at my PC, to which he blurted out to access the start menu. I retorted that my monitor was completely blank! He insisted I just move the mouse, which I did, yet still nothing. The chap suggested I give it a shake and just wait a blink. After shaking it a second time with no luck, I exclaimed, "Oh, I’ve just realised my PC is actually turned off!" He asked me to power it back on, so I slowly rebooted it until he could hear Windows coming to life. Once that was sorted, he directed me to “start,” and I quizzed him, "Start what exactly?" He clarified it was the start menu in the bottom-left of the screen. I mentioned my lack of computer prowess and that my wife usually handles it; would he be so kind as to ring back when she’s finished at the mental health clinic? It was amusing how he didn’t quite catch on! I could sense his frustration growing, yet he persisted, saying he could guide me through it. Again, he droned on about moving my mouse to the bottom-left corner, where a Windows logo should appear, and I simply replied that it perplexed me. He insisted it was right in front of me. I quipped back saying my window was actually behind my sofa! I had to apologise for the mix-up, as it struck me as odd he kept blabbering about a window, so I mused whether my mouse might have a hidden antenna. No, no, he meant my PC’s monitor, bless him. Then, out of nowhere, I started making a fuss and pretended to shout at my non-existent cat, claiming it had just devoured my mouse. I whimpered that I’d need to ring my wife to have the cat taken to the vet! I was nearly in tears, asking him if he could provide me with the number for a cab service or even my wife's mobile. The poor bloke eventually lost patience, declaring me mad and terminating the call. I do wonder if he’ll have the nerve to ring again!

I got a couple of calls from this number, but the accent was so strong I honestly couldn’t make out what the person was saying.

Today, my wife got a call from someone who said his name was Jeff. He tried to get her to turn on the computer, but she wasn’t having any of it and just said no.

Is there seriously nothing that can be done about these annoying callers? With all the tech we have nowadays, you’d think the government would be able to sort this out, but they just let it slide. It’s frustrating how powerless they seem!

Switch your computer off straight away, then do a virus scan. Also, have a look through your installed programs to see if anything weird has popped up recently.

Caller claimed his name was Jeff. I humoured him for a while, then mentioned I didn't own a computer. He got all aggressive, saying I was fibbing and just trying to hide my PC. Once he realised I wasn’t going to give him what he wanted, he turned really nasty.

If you can't manage to switch off your laptop, maybe try shutting down your router instead. If you havent tried turning off the laptop first, give that a go.

This number called me and when I picked up, all I got was complete silence on the other end. No one said a word. Just wondering, who could they be?

Got one of those typical calls from India again, saying there's some issue with my computer. Same old story every time.

So this bloke kept telling me I had some kind of issue with my computer. I just pretended not to know what he was talking about, and I reckon the guy from India thought I was an easy target. But when he figured out I was mucking about with him, he gave up and ended the call. Bit of a shame really, I was quite entertained by the whole thing!

Got a call earlier today from someone claiming to be “Dominic” from “Tech Helpline” - weird thing was his accent was really strong and the number he called from didn’t show up anywhere. He kept going on about issues with my PC but I wasn’t having any of it and made sure to end the call myself before he could drag me into something dodgy.

Hey, I get these calls loads and honestly, I find them quite funny. I like to drag the conversation out as much as I can, these daft lot on the other end probably think we're all mugs. Used to be that they'd claim they were with Microsoft, I'd keep chatting for ages, then drop the bomb that I’m actually on Apple lol. Now they’re even less clued up, don’t even know what company they’re representing or they bung up their fake British names. Proper muppets. Cheers, Danny from Bradford.

I was silly enough to let them help me because I was having issues with my desktop. After they got access to my laptop, when I tried to back out, they just wouldn’t let me. Now they’ve taken over my laptop and I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do next. Anyone got advice?

Similar to all the others, this foreign chap claiming to be from Microsoft was rather irate the moment we mentioned we didn’t have an internet connection.